Time to share the top five "no-thank-you" moments. Don't get me wrong, England is a lovely place, but there were definitely a few things that took me a while to get used to.

1. The food. You have no idea how hard it is to find a sandwich without mayo. They put mayo on everything. Then there's the issue of meat-flavored chips. Take a walk down the snack isle and you'll find potato chips in a variety of unusual flavors including prawn, beef, and chicken. Lastly, there was the daily traditional English breakfast which includes beans with toast, mushrooms, eggs over easy or scrambled, assorted meats, and, of coarse, tea. It's hard to complain about the breakfast because it was free everyday, but I will say that I do not plan on bringing the bean and toast combination back to the States with me.

2. Black boogers. Don't act grossed out. You've had them too. The dust and dirt in London turned all of our boogers black. Some hypothesized that it was probably soot from the Tube, others that it was pollution in the air, but whatever it was, it was somehow dirtier than LA.

3. "Historical" places. The problem with "Shakespeare's Birthplace" is that it has to be put in quotes. Just about every display said something along the lines of "This area is where Shakespeare could have possibly walked maybe sometime in his lifetime." Didn't Shakespeare's house burn down? The video presentations and the ring that maybe possibly might have been worn by Shakespeare made me question why I bought a ticket. Did Will himself install the electrical wires? I'm glad I went though, otherwise I'd feel like I maybe could have possibly-probably-perhaps missed something interesting.

4. Anti-smoking ads. Some of our buddies at The Dirty Duck showed us England's means of deterring smokers from smoking. On every pack of cigarettes there is a big "Smoking Kills" sticker and a horrifying photograph. For example, a popular image on the cigarette packs is a mouth of completely rotted teeth with information about the affects of tobacco on your teeth. Whatever was left of the teeth (which wasn't much) was completely blackened and looked like it was growing mold. Another photo was of a person lying on a biopsy table with their insides exposed so that their damaged lungs could be visible. Basically, the English government is trying to tell smokers that smoking is bad for you. Consequently, smokers ignore the photos and the rest of us dry-heave.

5. Stratford-Upon-Avon's community bedtime. Everything in Stratford closes early. Not that there would necessarily be much to do if the shops and restaurants did stay open later, it would just be nice to have the option. We were warned not to go near the church's graveyard at night because that's where the junkies hang out, but after being there a week I sort of understand why. There's nothing to do. After a week of quaint country town life, we were all ready to be back in London.